last entry (?)

if i had to leave today:

i want to let you know that i love you. my love is always true
forgive me from all the mistakes i've done to upset you, to fail you
thank you for everything
live well
live fruitfully
help others in need
do not let bad things to happen to you or to others
don't forget me on my birthday
love your loved ones even more. cherish every moment
family should always comes first

most of all, to anyone who will read this someday. i am always here for you. my concerns still lives within everything around you for you.

this goes to everyone of you.

my head suddenly aches... i can't bear it.

that night with candy

yup, that night when i was drank and sober. when i escape the drinking table just to see facebook and my phone. i told you i have something to tell you. i really want to tell you that but i just can't. it is common that you'll ask me what was it, that you should know, or else you'll get mad at me. i really don't want to tell because i know it's not the right time yet. i am only on an ecstatic setting that everything down to my subconscious are flying out of my mind and out of my mouth. that's a pretty clumsy night. but like i said, i never lie. all of those are all true. but i did not tell you everything. because those things are something you don't want to know. i just said it to content you. what i have said is only a part, but barely half of everything. when you read this, and ask me again, i think i'll just let you get mad and ignore me than telling you what really is.

it is too early to tell. but there are things i'm happy about. i can not stand not talking to you. i can't hold on to grudge for a longer time, and i am vulnerable when i have more alcohol than i can take. you might find it funny and entertaining, but it cost me me everything that i've been keeping since i know you.

well, that night was awesome! thanks

worked

i am afraid it is over now. blogging really works and i am done with this for now. internally i have fixed everything and i can't believe that i am smiling at this moment. i am happy, i got now my pace back.looking forward for tomorrow! thank you blog you absorbed everything from me. keep it first i might want to get it back someday..till then